Wednesday, Jul. 28, 2004 - 6:37 p.m.
I've wanted to write for at least a week now. But getting internet is proving to be more difficult than I had anticipated. I finally got ok-ed to get it and then got the software only to find that it won't run on my laptop. Thankfully, my mother is sending me my computer from home, so it should be up soon. Then I will feel less disconnected and be able to keep up this job search thing more consistently.
Other news, big news I suppose.
A week and a half ago I took a leap. I stoppped overthinking things and decide to go with my gut, with my feelings. I kissed my friend Jairo.
I'm happy I did. We talked. We were in the same boat. Neither one of us knew exactly what was going on, but didn't want to ruin a good friendship. I think we still don't quite know what's goign on, but we're running with it.
He's very quiet and kind of shy and whereas I'm all sorts of verbal, he's not. But, I'm getting used to that too.
This guy makes me *feel* beautiful in a way I've never felt before just by looking at me. And he says things that feel genuine that matter to me. Like I asked if this was why he'd started hanging out with me after work and he said "I just wanted to get to know you."
And everything has been so comfortable. The transition from just friends to this.
It's a little scary, how quickly something can sneak up on you (or if you think of it another way how much you can bury a part of yourself). But right now, I'm happy, and I'm running with it.
